Happy Holidays

[polymods]

✖ THE MALL

Ⅰ. THE REASON FOR THE SEASON
Boy, wasn’t November exciting? How about those Black Friday deals, huh? Hope you’ve had fun camping out in furniture stores! You can of course continue to bunk there, but the High Temple is also open to all Travelers again this month if you’d rather sleep there. Don’t forget to stock up on items that could fit inside your Traveler bag - this is the perfect time to get that fancy moisturizer you’ve been missing, some books, or maybe a copy of the hot new video game Bonestorm!

As December rolls in, you’ll notice that there’s even MORE holiday cheer to be found! Pressing in on all sides of you! Suffocating you! Or maybe you’re one of those people who just lives for carols and huge plastic evergreens decked out in tinsel and lights, in which case you’re going to be thrilled!

There are indeed plenty of those aforementioned trees throughout the mall, alongside wire and light reindeer, glowing stars, and oversized novelty gift boxes. If you have keen eyes you’ll notice that hidden throughout the mall are dozens of small, creepy elves with dead vacant eyes. They don’t do anything. They just… watch.

Who on earth could they be reporting to?

---

Ⅱ. HE SEES YOU WHEN YOU’RE SLEEPING
At the center of the mall concourse there is now a miniature village set up, themed entirely in ice and snow and candy. At the center of this plastic paradise is a lavishly decorated chair, and in front of it a camera. At times marked clearly on a schedule at the village gate you can wait in line behind a red velvet rope for your turn to see him.

Who? Well. That depends.

In many worlds, there is a benevolent figure who appears in December, bearing gifts for all the good children. Santa is the most likely person you’ll find sitting on that big chair, ho-ho-hoing and looking as kind and jolly as any creature possibly could.

Maybe you’re from somewhere without a Santa Claus, but with some other equivalent. In that case, you might see what you’re familiar with instead!

Regardless of his exact form, the figure who beckons you to sit beside him has only one concern: have you been nice?

Niceness is subjective, but if you’ve managed it you will be rewarded. With a twinkle in his eye, the Non-Denominational Mall Figure will reach into his magic bag and pull out a gift, JUST for you! What could it be?!

Oh, and don’t forget to smile for the photo! You may pick it up in half an hour once it is developed.

But if you’ve been naughty, or if you sneak over to that chair during the OFF hours? In that case there will be a cracking noise and the sudden overwhelming scent of rank goat.

“Better luck next year,” the Non-Denominational Mall Figure says sadly, his eyes trained on something over your shoulder. Turn your head and you’ll see that your naughtiness has attracted another holiday staple: Krampus.

Yes, this hairy, horned devil carries chains and bitch rods, the latter of which he uses to whip the everloving shit out of you if he catches you. You’ll have to outrun him long enough that he gets bored, or find some other way to distract him or pay him off. Maybe there’s a German market set up in the mall somewhere where you could get Krampus to do a Smorgasvein with you?

Notes:
1. This month if your character has been nice, they may receive ONE special item! They may only receive this gift once - multiple attempts to see the Non-Denominational Mall Figure will result in Krampus appearing instead.

The special item you may pick for your character can be one of the following:

- one animal companion. This animal can travel with your character from island to island from now on. The only stipulation is that it must be able to fit comfortably on the ferryboat. If your animal is too large, your character can instead get a mini version!

- one carriable item from your character’s homeland. In the case of weapons, this must be something that is not game breaking in terms of power level. (ie: yes, you can get a gun, no you can’t get a gun that explodes the sun.)

- a collection of holiday candies, all of which have magical healing properties.

2. You determine if your character’s actions put them on the Naughty or Nice list

---

Ⅲ. WINTER WONDERLAND
As you wander through the mall you will notice that amongst all the holiday decorations a large area on the first floor that was closed last month is now lit up and has a welcome sign standing outside. Whatever could it be?

Perhaps a bigger and better Orange Julius?

No silly! It's an indoor ice skating rink. And as if that isn't cool enough - get it? Cool? - it would seem that for the whole month skate rentals are free. So go on, slap on a pair of skates and take a whirl around the ice rink! Show everyone your fancy moves or just try not to fall on your ass.

Don't feel like skating? That's okay, there are dorky performances happening at noon and 5pm where a group of people dressed up as holiday creatures will skate around in formation and do tricks.

If you’re more mature, at 8pm there's a live jazz band that will play music for the skaters.

There’s plenty of beverages and foods to be sampled from the holiday kiosks that have popped up close to the rink.

Notes:
1. This is a public ice rink so you will have to share space with people, so if you plan on throwing out a triple lutz or whatever then you might want to make sure you don't hit or slice into anyone with your skates.

---

Ⅳ. ALL I WANT IS YOU
Cheerful generic holiday music fills the hall as the Christmas celebration hits full swing with a slightly panicked glee. The same rotation of a dozen different carols cycles through, one after the other, hour after hour. There are only a few refuges from the mind numbing music through the mall - that one New Age import shop that hasn’t changed its world music CD in a decade, and Spicy Subject which only plays pop punk covers of carols. Even the bathrooms aren’t safe from that rise and fall of notes that let you know a certain diva is going to tell you that you’re all she wants for Christmas.

Just as the hundredth iteration of the song is about to drive you mad, there’s a tremendous crash. A twenty foot tall Christmas tree that had once been suspended in the middle of the food court has crushed the Pizza Corner and taken out the power source for half the Mall’s sound system in one go. A caped figure escapes along the rafters that once supported the tree in a cloud of heavy fragrance. He pauses only once to bow as banner unfurls. Crude letters have been painted over a previous black Friday announcement: You have been warned: The Phantom!

The crowd begins to murmur and huddle in groups, and if you get nosy there are plenty of rumors. A teen from one of the ear piercing boutiques mentions a ghost story about a Luxuriate employee who got in a terrible accident while mixing bath bombs on site that rendered him permanently aromatic and with a permanent splitting headache that would have killed a lesser person. An older man from the Hotdog Hut pipes up that he disappeared into the labyrinth of hidden hallways that allow employees to navigate the mall for restocking and avoiding the overly aggressive salespeople. Every year the Phantom emerges in an attempt to banish the sky high notes of that ever popular Christmas carol, and every year the people who run the mall put it back in rotation.

Even after the incident with the choir.

A mother with two small children who are more puffy coat than person hushes the hotdog seller. It’s all nonsense of course. Some kind of interactive theater to drive up sales before the holidays. The looks that pass between the other employees, and the signs that the poor twenty-something postgrad working at Pizza Corner might have been crushed say otherwise.

So does the pungent waft of multifloral scent that starts to stalk you through the mall. Apparently, someone’s formed a crush, or are you giving him a terrible headache? What is it about you that you do better than anyone that might be appreciated by this deeply eccentric murder? Or what makes you the most annoying? Either way, it might be good to keep your hand at the level of your eyes because you’re about to be whisked away to the depths of the Mall into the Phantom’s lair.

Notes:
1. The Phantom is now more archetype than human. Killing him will probably not solve the issue, but it will make you smell like you’ve been eating bath bombs and drinking essential oils until New Year. Which could be fun.

2. Alternatively, if you agree with him about the music, you can always agree to team up to take out the rest of the sound system.

3. The Phantom has an excellent tenor voice. Just, you know, in case you were wondering.

Come on Jessica, come on Tori! Let's go to the mall, you won't be sorry!

Network · Logs · OOC · Memes · Plurk

Comments

Sephiroth | OTA

[unkindled_madness]

I. The Bookstore Life

[They don't have Christmas on Sephiroth's Planet. The decorations are unfamiliar, the pine trees inexplicable, and the reindeer unidentifiable. It's easy enough to glean the name of the holiday from all the songs, but the subject matter is all over the place.

Luckily the bookstores have helpfully placed holiday-themed books on display front-and-center, so he can peruse such informative titles as A Christmas Carol and How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Maybe informative isn't exactly the right word.

Sephiroth generally sticks to history and science otherwise, but you might also catch him investigating a small section labeled "Gay & Lesbian." It doesn't quite seem to have what he's looking for.]


II. Spicy Subject

[Okay, so pop punk is not exactly his preferred musical genre either, but with everywhere else cycling through the same 10 songs or so all day every day... he'll take it. The graphic T-shirts on display didn't entice him inside last month, but... there's a fair amount of black in here. That's nice.

He is not going anywhere near the hair dye, but he'll browse the accessories while he's taking refuge here.]


III. All I Want Is Never to Hear that Song Again

[The appearance of the Phantom is quite possibly the best thing that's happened all month. After witnessing the crash of the giant tree and the departure of the caped figure, Sephiroth proceeds to walk the food court, trying to determine a way to get up into the rafters after him.

Given his track record, you could hardly be faulted for thinking he has murder on the brain, but he's extremely appreciative. He's a lot more interested in seeing the rest of the sound system similarly destroyed. The chatter from the mallgoers seems to indicate the Phantom has never been entirely successful, though.]

((Please know that Sephiroth is at all times carrying around a 7-foot sword as if this is perfectly normal. And of course, if you'd like to do any plotting, feel free to hit me up at yinza!))

I. The Bookstore Life

[necrosavior]

Harrow likes books for the ideas, the theorems, the magical who gives a shit (necromancers). Gideon? She reads for the sexy ladies. Pictures all the better. She has a short stack of lesbian romances when she comes out of an aisle toward the holiday themed table with her favorite sparring partner at it. Gideon eyes it speculatively. The pictures on the covers match the mall's decor, but she hasn't more than glanced at them.

"Learn much?" Gideon reads one title. "We have to steal something?"

[unkindled_madness]

Sephiroth glances up. "Ah... No. The title is misleading. His theft was ultimately futile." Although he definitely understands the motive. A relatable character, this Grinch. "Charity seems to be a core tenet of this holiday, but I've yet to find any real explanation of its origins or... practices."

Why all the trees? What is up with this Santy Claus person? It's unclear.

[necrosavior]

"Stole Christmas AND lost?!" Gideon snorts. Then again, Christmas doesn't seem to be one item so much as a thousand of them. Stealing every tree and ribbon and the whole chair set up things would be a lot. Gideon has better things to do (what would she do with a tree?). "Picked up on the gift giving," Gideon nods. She eyes Sephiroth's sword. What to get for the friend who already has their primary weapon?

She runs her eyes over the other books on display. It feels like another language entirely. Like something connects all this for other people, and all Gideon has is ??? One labeled The Polar Express just has pictures. Gideon would have taken a train out of the Ninth House if trains went into space, into anywhere else. It looks like a fever dream from when she was younger. Not the most telling.

"If Christmas is when it's cold, then it's always Christmas at the Ninth House."

[unkindled_madness]

Sephiroth would never guess the reason for her appraisal of his sword. Obviously she's into swords. Why would she get him anything? Neither of them celebrate this holiday.

"Your entire planet is like that?" he wonders. "There are places on mine where the snow never melts-- the same as Earth's North Pole, I expect. But this celebration seems specific to December."

Having it year-round would surely drive a person mad.

[necrosavior]

The Ninth House and the images in the book aren't the same. For one, the clothes and buildings and train all look close to new, not old and molding and falling apart. For two, there's a kid younger than Harrow. The Ninth House lacks the banging capacity for children these days. For three, Gideon's lost track and stops caring.

"We don't really have weather," Gideon explains, "So there's not snow like in the pictures. Some frost and ice on the colder bits. The kind that bites in and never lets go. No trees or any--" She waves above the picture.

"We have more funerals than holidays."

[unkindled_madness]

"...honestly I prefer a funeral to all this."

It's excessive, gaudy, and seems determined not to permit anyone to abstain. Of course Midgar has its holidays and festivals, but they've always been very easy for him to avoid. The only place here which seems free from the influence of Christmas is the High Temple, and he likes that even less, actually.

[necrosavior]

Gideon looks at Sephiroth, and her look lingers. "With or without counting the 'at least one person died' issue?" Gideon asked. Sure, a Ninth funeral was from old age, the life sustained giving way for the construct to come. A second life as a farmer. Gideon would rather die somewhere else. Which sure, wish granted. She'd do better with her next one.

This... "No one's died of Christmas, right?"

[unkindled_madness]

"Do you imagine I would find a single death particularly upsetting?" Maybe once a long time ago, but if Gast had a funeral, he couldn't have gone. The ones he's attended since have been out of obligation rather than personal investment.

"I don't believe the vaunted spirit of Christmas can kill, although in one story it does show a man his own grave."

[necrosavior]

"If it were mine," Gideon winked. It's not like people have been dying here. Already dead, maybe, but it would be awkward to attend someone's funeral with them, walking and breathing even if they were still dead. She is still hazy on what her status is, mostly relieved Harrow is/can be alive.

She shrugs. "You can see your grave any time you like on the Ninth. Just go down like ten flights of stairs." That isn't scary. Not in a system of necromancers.

[unkindled_madness]

The wink just earns her a flat stare. She may be among the weirdoes who want to call him a friend but that doesn't mean he reciprocates.

"Are you saying that you dig your graves in advance?" An odd practice unless there's specific cause to anticipate death.

[necrosavior]

The stare earns a light fistbump to his shoulder. Most of the Ninth wouldn't be upset that she died. Crux is probably livid to be denied her corpse. Tough shit for him.

"Eh, it's more like recycling," Gideon says, "Nothing goes to waste, so eventually you get treated and animated into a construct to work the snow leek fields. Or get smashed apart in sword training exercises. Or become prayer beads. Or--you get the picture. Alcoves are right down there, already dug."

[unkindled_madness]

Sephiroth doesn't retaliate for the fistbump, but he does take a step away. No thanks on the touching.

"It sounds quite orderly. I would say that death usually isn't."

I

[detectivemiracle]

"Good choice," Chloe comments from behind him - she's spotted him perusing the holiday titles. There's a big table full of them in the middle of the store, it's hard to miss, after all. She smiles at the copy of How the Grinch Stole Christmas that he's currently holding. "That's one of my daughter's favorites."

[unkindled_madness]

Sephiroth lifts his gaze from the book to glance back at her.

"Unfortunately, it isn't proving especially illuminating." Even in terms of how Christmas is celebrated, it's hard to distinguish what might be accurate and what might have been included as part of a silly children's story.

[detectivemiracle]

"What sort of, uh, illumination are you looking for?" Chloe asks, curious. She's kind of assuming he doesn't have Christmas where he comes from, but she's learned the hard way that assumptions can lead to trouble.

[unkindled_madness]

"This entire holiday is unfamiliar to me," he confirms. "Some songs indicate it commemorates the birth of some sort of king, but this 'Santy Claus' character seems more prominent."

Maybe he serves the king? Unclear.

[detectivemiracle]

Chloe laughs a little. Definitely not at Sephiroth - mostly at her own world's silliness. "Yeah, that's because Christmas is like this big hodgepodge of a bunch of different cultural traditions, and different people celebrate it in different ways. For some people, it's religious - it commemorates the birth of an important religious figure. For some people, it's not, it's just about giving gifts and eating lots of food. And for some people, it's a mix of things."

[unkindled_madness]

"I see. That does make some sense of it, actually." When taken as multiple holidays celebrated simultaneously rather than trying to form some singular narrative out of it all.

[detectivemiracle]

"Hope it helps," Chloe says with a smile. "I'm not religious, personally -" (which is kind of hilarious given who she's dating back home but it's the truth) - "but I've always enjoyed the gift-giving aspects of it. Spending time with loved ones, that kind of thing."

[unkindled_madness]

"I suppose I can see more appeal in that than in a religious observance." Which isn't saying a lot, but he can recognize that most people do seem to enjoy gifts and loved ones.

[detectivemiracle]

That's right, Sephiroth famously claims not to have close relationships. Chloe smiles a little.

"There's also usually a lot of really good food."

[unkindled_madness]

He really doesn't, but he may be... forming some...? Don't ask him.

Food is not really an indulgence of his either. "Are you referring to all the peppermint?"

[detectivemiracle]

"There's a lot of peppermint stuff sometimes, yeah," she agrees with a laugh. "Sweet things of all sorts. A lot of people do big fancy dinners, almost as elaborate as Thanksgiving - turkey and gravy and stuffing."

[unkindled_madness]

He does, at least, know what turkey is.

"I take it Thanksgiving is some sort of feast day?"